Category Archives: “Swamis” the novel

Surf, Music, Dance, Poetry… STUFF

Posted on by under "Swamis" the novel, real surfers, surf novels, writings of Erwin Dence

THIS is a silkscreen I did in the 1980s. I’m not apologizing for it being, perhaps, sexist or something bad by today’s standards. It doesn’t go so much with a poem I’ve been working on, but nothing I found in a search did either. I COULD, of course, draw something that does connect better, but… I haven’t.

I AM ALWAYS working on something, art-wise, story-wise, song-wise, otherwise. I have been working recently on a song that starts out, “It was a private conversation, Words I was not yet meant to hear, She had been to long at the station, Couldn’t have known that I was near…”

WHAT I DO is keep working on these songs, and everything I do until it’s… better. SURF-WRITING-WISE, I am always trying to push some comparison between the best moments and music, even dance. Not all dancing is graceful, Stephanie Gilmore style pretty. AND she also incorporates solidly radical, powerful moves into her repertoire. Similarly, there is something esthetically pleasing about a vicious power hack.

MUSIC-WISE, please try to convince me that you don’t have some tune or beat going through your head when you’re paddling for and surfing a wave. If you don’t, well…

Too much explaining.

                        A Private Conversation

I was coming up the stairway, two bags of groceries pressed against my chest, She was dancing on the landing, third floor, Sun from the distant windows lit her hair on fire, Her shadow moving with her on the sidewall.

Six stairs below her, I leaned against the inside rail.

She was moving to music, music I could not hear.

Her movements made the music real. Slink and slide and step and stop, Step and stop, slink and slide, one arm always at her side, The other, gliding, raised then lowered, Free, and spelling or signing or reflecting, Words or images or memories or dreams,   Real to her.

Real to her, private.

Sunset music, light, a tinkling rhythm beat under the woodwinds, Only fleeting hints of nightfall.

I should not have been a witness, Seeing her, dancing, silent, hair on fire,  In some soft and private conversation with some distant, absent, loved one.

Loved one, someone else dancing with her on the landing, Sharing her space.

The background, The air and the light and the wallpaper and the paint were as alive as she was, Slinking and sliding and stepping and slowing, Listening, perhaps, briefly, The dance resumed as response.

Her other arm became the free one, Sending the code, The secret, private messages in our most ancient language.

I should not have been there.

I couldn’t face facing her, Couldn’t imagine her trying to explain, Not to some neighbor, some stranger three doors down.

Setting my bags on the third step from the landing, Sitting two stairs below that, Alone in the dark, with vague shadows of someone dancing, Projected on the stairwell wall.

I envied her for dancing, dancing alone in the hallway, Music swirling in her head.

Waiting in the stairwell,   Waiting long after her door closed, Long after the light moved up the wall and softened, And darkened, I waited long until her music faded.  

My steps up became drums, not heavy, Step, step, step,

If I imagined a saxophone solo, Sad squeaks and missed notes, Looking out the window at a screaming orange sunset, I couldn’t stop myself from sliding one foot across the worn oak floor, And then the other, My grocery bags shifting, side to side, In some rhythm that made some sense… to me.

THANKS FOR READING. Original material, of course, protected by copyright, all rights reserved by the author/artist, Erwin A. Dence, Jr.

AS ALWAYS, IF YOU CAN’T BE NICE, BE REAL.

I FULLY expect to not tell you about a surf session in the next posting. AND, yes, I am still working on my novel, “SWAMIS.”

Time Out of Water, Not out of Mind

Posted on by under "Swamis" the novel, northwest surfing, old surfers, real surfers

BECAUSE I fell off a ladder, because I didn’t treat a leg wound quickly or seriously in time, because I had a detached retina that necessitated an operation, I have been out of the water for well over a month. BECAUSE my being forced to go to a doctor (forced as in, I lost sight in the bottom fourth of my left eye, as in I could not operate on my swollen leg) for the first time in twelve years or so, with conditions there was no way for me to treat, I also discovered my blood pressure was high enough that there was some doubt as to whether I was a decent candidate for the eye surgery, AND, meanest thing that was done to me, I was weighed.

TWO THINGS: Adam “WIPEOUT” James, forced to help me zip up my wetsuit a while back, asked me, “Do you have to have ice cream every night?” Keith Darrock has been bugging me for a while to lose weight, claiming that if I lost 75 pounds, I could “Dominate even more. Maybe, like, pop up.”

Seventy-five pounds is not enough.

NOW, with the eye almost totally restored to its previous state, the leg wound/infection being treated with $600 a tube ointment and round-the-clock wearing of compression socks, my blood pressure being monitored daily, a shift in my eating habits (more fibre, less coffee, no Little Debbie’s, no ice cream, no chocolate- yet), and the possibility of waves, like, maybe, maybe, an hour ago, I’m still out of the water, I want to assert that I will be back, and, when I’m out, I’ll be frothed-out, and, as alway, there to surf.

Fair warning. Catch them when you can. I’m not looking for sympathy. Injuries happen. I’m not looking for excuses. I’m not quitting. And no, I don’t want to go watch others surf. Again, “I’M HERE TO SURF!”

Be real if you can’t be nice.

Tightening “Swamis,” Surf Friends and…

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…that’s pretty much it. Painting season is happening, and the time I can devote to writing is diminished to, like, not much. There are some other issues that keep me out of the water. When there’s no chance to surf, my studying of the charts and buoys and forecasts is less important. If I can’t go, do I want to know?

Probably. Do I still want to hear when some of my friends score? Probably. No, definitely.

Here is how house painting works: You prep and paint; body and trim. Then you go around and around the house doing what I call “Tightening up.” Then you clean up, load up, collect the money; move on.

I am still… still working on the current, hopefully last edit of my surf novel, “Swamis.” The biggest benefit of my trying to condense and focus is that I can tighten up the details. Here is an example: In the current ending, a pistol is taken from Joey’s Falcon. I have already set it up that Joey always locks his car. I am at the point in the rewrite in which Joey is sharing a story about his father, a San Diego County Sheriff’s Office detective, in which Joe DeFreines, Sr. has a run in with a couple of drunks at a Pony League baseball game, one of whom is sitting in his car, refuses to get out, and when he does, the Drunk Dad breaks the detective’s arm with a baseball bat another Drunk Dad hands him.

Joey’s father defends himself; the net result being that the Drunk Dad sues the Sheriff’s Office with the help of the attorney father of one of Joey’s schoolmates. The lesson from the baseball bat incident, Joey witll tell (haven’t fit this part in yet) the psychologist he is seeing as a alternative to going to Juvenile Hall for a violent act he committed on another schoolmate, is, as Joey’s father said; “I should have locked my car.” That the Falcon is unlocked, and a pistol that is inside is used in the climactic scene… well, that’s all part of the fun.

People come and go in our lives. The cut-down number of characters in “Swamis,” I realize, must be included for some good reason. They must seem real. Joey wants to be part of a group of surfers who could be considered “LOCALS.” He has friends from school who surf, who he labels as “Surf friends.” When he comes to terms with the attorney’s son, who has been taunting him (with some help from Joey’s surf friends), but who, before Joey’s accident that is pivotal to the plot, was his friend, I plan on giving that character an opportunity to tell Joey, “You need to… broaden your definition of friends.”

Or words to that effect.

We run into surfers and non-surfers. Not all are our friends. Some might never be. Some could be.

Okay, now I’m thinking about when I can go surfing again. Soon.

Modest Cover and Changing Justifications

Posted on by under "Swamis" the novel, women surfers in the Northwest,

HERE, edited, is the piece I meant to post last Wednesday:

THE DIFFERENCE between what I write for realsurfers and pretty much anything else I write is that much of what is posted is written on site, under the real or imagined pressure (mostly imagined) of having to be somewhere else other than wailing away on my borrowed laptop.

EDITING is the difference. Re-reading, rewriting; trying to push randomness into cohesion, trying to produce something, hopefully, readable, worthwhile.

In direct contradiction of this statement, I’m suddenly thinking of how chaotic winds can, on occasion, turn into lined-up waves.

Yeah, that sounds kind of braggy; maybe I’ll edit it out.

AFTER THE FACT, I would like to add something(s) to a recent post in which I neglected to say how, when I was a teenager, and the only surfers who entered discussions with my friends who surfed were those in our age bracket. Surfers, we concluded, at sixteen or seventeen, peak at nineteen. It was fine to take girls to the beach if you were planning on, maybe, making out, rather than actually surfing. Having a girlfriend who actually surfed, rather one who was willing to watch her boyfriend surf was not discussed.

The thrill of watching me surf wore off fairly early for Trish. Still, we had some sessions.

WHAT I NOW WANT TO EMPHASISE is that opinions and attitudes change. AND NEED TO.

NOW I see couples, some with children, taking turns in the water. GREAT!

MY MOTHER was left out of the original post. She loved going to the beach, and would load up her seven children, sometimes a friend, and all our gear, and head out. When my older sister, SUELLEN, and I started riding boards, learning more about where better waves were, and when (not noon), our mother was more than willing to go earlier and to check out spots beyond TAMARACK. Grandview? Black’s Beach? We looked.

A bit of a shoutout to our dad, I distinctly remember both my parents taking me to 15th Street, Del Mar, as kind of a part of a rare date away from the whole of their family, sitting in the parking lot as I ‘practiced’ for a high school surfing contest.  

Here, not for the sake of argument, are a couple of possibly sexist drawings I didn’t include last time:

I SAID I was honoring International Women’s Day and then displayed a retrospective of my drawings and silkscreens that, by today’s standards and my own changed ideas on how women should be portrayed, may make me seem a bit more sexist/cave person-like than I would like to believe I am. Is it still okay to portray nude women under some modest cover that argues it is not objectification? I DON’T KNOW. If I figure it out I will let you know. I do know that justifying working on nudes in my thirties (I also did landscapes and illustrations of surfing and houses) was different, if not easier, than it would be in my seventies.  

THAT SAID, I should address my own behavior in the water. AS IN, do I surf in a sexist manner?  I do consider myself an equal opportunity wave hog. As in, if I see an opportunity to go for a wave… I do. The relative competence of others in the water is a factor. HAVING SAID THAT, I now wish to claim that I’m not as bad as I once was. EVOLVING? Just getting older? Debatable. ADDITIONALLY… No, that’s enough.

EXCEPT, that, there’s all the hype and social bullshit around surfing, all the what it can be (magic) and what it is (difficult, impossible to conquer or to perfect). If you take every experience you have had in surfing, from your first times wading into the water, to now; what is it you cherish the most, what is it you remember first and most fondly?

YEAH, I thought so. 

Original silkscreen, from 1980s, found in the attic.

AS ALWAYS, THANKS for checking out realsurfers. Updates on my novel, “SWAMIS,” and other stuff on Wednesday. All rights to all original, copyrighted work are reserved by Erwin A. Dence, Jr.

Additions and Corrections and, Yeah, More

Posted on by under "Swamis" the novel, real surfers, surf fiction, surf novels, surfing art, surfing Southern California in the 60s, surfing Swamis

“SWAMIS” UPDATE- Working on it. Here is a quickie flyer for a fictional Newspaper. I can’t say that there wasn’t such a weekly paper back in the time my novel covers, 1969. My guess, yes. I do know, based on a story I heard, later, like 1971, when I went to work in the Big City, San Diego, from an older guy, that there were Free Clinics, or, at least, one. “So, I picked up this hitchhiking Hippie chick, and I’m thinking… you know, free sex and all that, and she says she’s trying to get to the free clinic.”

Also not related, directly: I noticed, on occasional trips south, in the narrow strip that is Mission Beach, a storefront law office that, real or imagined, seemed to offer free services. Hard to imagine that now. Parking, incidentally, was pretty much as bad then as it is now.

If writing, journalism or fiction, or drawing, or any form of art is someone trying to transfer imagination to paper or wood or film or any other medium, images stored and remembered are the critical ingredient.

Although I haven’t quite gotten to THE END of the fourth or fifth rewrite of “Swamis,” I do have plans, beyond it, for the main characters. The storefront law office might be part of that.

MEANWHILE, I am still recovering from cuts and an infection on my leg, the treatment keeping me out of the water for at least the rest of this week. SO, IF THERE ARE WAVES, I won’t be competing for them. GOOD LUCK.

SCREW UP of the day- I did write something, using Microsoft Word, filling in some omissions from my last posting. Halfway through this, I realized I hadn’t copied it. Not wanting to lose what I had, I… well, I’ll get back to you on what is partially “Guilty with an explanation” stuff.

In the “I’M NOT POLITICAL, BUT…” category, something about the delays in the trials of the former president, and the inability of some other citizens to see a grift when it’s reaching into their pockets, caused me to draw… this:

It’s already, liike, last week’s news. Ordinarily I claim all rights to my work, but, this time, in the spirit of freedom, free press, all that, if you want to borrow it… FEEL FREE.

International Women’s (Surfing) Day and…

Posted on by under "Swamis" the novel, Erwin Dence illustrations, Melissa Lynch illustrations, old surfers, real surfers, surf illustrations, surfing art

…and when, perhaps, men are going to catch up or on. If ever.

When I started board surfing in 1965, almost fourteen-years-old, there were girls and women who surfed. Not that many, and those who were good at it were known by name. In San Diego’s North County, Barbie Barron from Oceanside, and Margo Godfrey were the main contenders.

It would be totally wrong if I didn’t mention that my older sister, Suellen, got me into board surfing. If Suellen had romantic notions about what surfing is, and she did, and we all do, the truth is that sometimes surfing lives up to those notions.

Trish went to Junior High with Barbie and was a member of an upstart Oceanside Girls Surfing Club before Trisha’s father got transferred to Philadelphia. I would run into Barbie frequently when I got out of High School, 1969, and did a lot of pre-work, dawn patrol surfing at the short jetty south of Oceanside harbor. Trish, who came back west in 1968 with a lot of east coast sophistication and a touch of the vibe (so alluring to a rube from Fallbrook), would ask if I actually spoke to her. No. Barbie did own the Offshore Surf Shop in Carlsbad for years. I reached out shortly after she retired. So, still no.

My only live almost interaction with Margo Godfrey was a big-but-blown out afternoon at Swamis, Scott Sutton, Jeff Officer, and I stuck with that situation because we had to wait for Scott’s father to do whatever he had to do that was more important than taking kids surfing. Margo and Cheer Critchlow were walking out, so casually, hitting the outside lineup, while we were going for the insiders.

I did write about my one interaction with the most famous woman surfer of that generation, Joyce Hoffman, from Christmas of 1970, the piece entitled “Joyce Hoffman’s Bra.” It is Google-able. I checked.

Oh, and I threw in a shot of Silvana Lima to represent women surfers who rip but don’t, perhaps, fit into the ‘image’ that sponsors are looking for. The image issue is, to a lesser extent, perhaps, also true on the men’s competitive side.

This is probably the right time to apologize for my attitude toward women. I love women, and my realization that boys and men treat women, um, rudely, and artists, trying to capture something of the beauty and wonder of women are insensitive if not clueless. So, yeah, one of those “I didn’t know, I don’t know, I’m working on it” kind of man-pologies.

Here’s how this post happened: I wanted to write about women who surf. Not finding anything I was stoked on in a quick web image search, I decided to check out my own media library. These are images that have appeared on this site. Some of the silk screen images are from the 1980s when I thought it was completely a good thing to do nudes. You know, like, tasteful.

Because of the way I put this post together, the writing is as disjointed as the images. Still:

Margo Godfrey, Santa Cruz, Oct 1969
from pinterest
taken from Matt Warshaw’s Encyclopedia of Surfing

The second from the bottom drawing was done by my youngest sister, Melissa. She died of metastatic breast cancer a few years ago. She did surf. She was so committed to producing high quality, high emotion images. I endeavor to live up to her standards, knowing I have a long way to go.

The last image is of my favorite surfer girl, Trish.

All original art works are protected by copyright, all rights reserved. Thanks for respecting that. AND… I have more to say about macho-ness and all that. Quick shout out to WARM CURRENTS. Check them out.

Getting Back to You

Posted on by under "Swamis" the novel, Erwin Dence surf illustrations, northwest surfing, old surfers, Original Erwin t-shirts, real surfers, Uncategorized

My most recent post featured some of my latest drawings, contenders for a spot as an ORIGINAL ERWIN t-shirt. UNFORTUNATELY, one of them got lost in the scuffle. But, good news, I got the images rescanned and now….

There are the images, here’s the story (Optional), bottom to top:

Here’s a mockup of a shirt design I did for the Port Townsend PUBLIC Library (officially for the ‘Friends of the…’) SUMMER READING Project. It would be clearer on the actual shirt, and the colors… different.

Here’s me attempting to look fierce in a French Beret someone left on a fencepost after some Port Townsend hipster, evidently, lost it in a fit of utter euphoria. I’m holding Stephen R. Davis’s hammer, total prop. There is a story here involving some injuries I incurred taking a (stupid) fall off a ladder and onto two open paint cans. Crushed them, cut the back of both of my legs. Ten days later I got to go to Urgent Care for an (even stupider) infection (swelling, red lines down my leg, that kind of stuff) I have photos, best not shared. Antibiotics and Advil, I’m on the mend.

THIS leads us to the top two images. SO, NINE days after my fall, STEPHEN R. DAVIS and I are out on the Strait, and getting skunked. OF COURSE. But, I had my thumb drive with me, and on it was the top image that, for some technical reason, I was not able to transfer to my computer. AND there was a print shop on the way out of Port Angeles.

SO I cruise in there and get a reversal (2nd image) of the drawing. SINCE we’re skunked and it’s still early, we cruise up Lincoln to the NXNW surf shop. I’ve talked to the new owner (Frank Crippen’s successor) about selling some of my stuff and he’s been agreeable. There are a couple of other surfers in the shop, obviously skunked. I set the copy on the counter and one of the guys is just staring at it, running fingers down the various lines, muttering “Oh” and “Whoa” long enough that I had to say, “Hey, man, it’s just lines and dots.” “Whoa!”

I’m still leaning on this one for the next shirt. I’ll definitely keep you posted. MEANWHILE, surf ’em if (and when you find ’em. More stuff on Wednesday.

Oh, yeah, and all ORIGINAL ERWIN images are copyrighted, all rights reserved by Erwin A. Dence, Jr.

Original Erwins in Progress, “Swamis” Again

Posted on by under "Swamis" the novel, Erwin Dence illustrations, northwest surfing, Original Erwin t-shirts, real surfers, realsurfers illustrations, surf fiction, surf novels, surfing art, surfing Swamis, surfing the strait of juan de fuca

Now that I am committed to putting out a new round of ORIGINAL ERWIN t-shirts, I’m going through my past drawings AND doing some new ones. I scanned these two on my printer AND I have two more illustrations that I have to take to a print shop. AS ALWAYS, attempting to go simpler, I fail.

LET’S DISCUSS THE SURF SITUATION on the Olympic Peninsula and the Strait of Juan de Fuca. NOT GOOD. Now, if you’re almost anywhere SOUTH of here, you should be scoring. AND the forecast is not too… thrilling. BUT I do have my HOBIE patched up and I’ve done some work on the MANTA. I’m ready to leap into some wind chop when it… let me check the forecast. Yeah, wind chop. That’s official.

As far as “Swamis” goes, I am committed to what JUST HAS TO BE a final draft before the ridiculously scary act of trying to actually sell the novel. I moved the former first chapter to the end, and though I am dying to write about what fictionally happened to the fictional characters between 1969 and now, I’m going to NOT… not yet.

My hope is that, now that I’ve completely mind-surfed the hell out of plot and characters, I might be able to cut the length down from the current 104,000 thousand words. HERE IS the new prologue and a bit more:

“SWAMIS” A novel by Erwin A. Dence, Jr.

                                    PROLOGUE

            Some events, terror and bliss, mostly, which occurred in seconds, in moments; those almost nothing in the expanse of time; expand, over time, into placemarks; a corner turned, a road taken, a life changed. Magic.

            Half a century after the events, I started writing “Swamis,” as memoir. It no longer is that. This is my fourth full rewrite, with so many discarded words, deleted chapters, all in attempting to turn notes and dreams, images and remembered dialogue, into a story. I have tried to do justice to the various people, characters here, but real people with real lives, who changed mine. There are people who have come into my life, changed it in some way, and gone out. Somewhere. For the most part I do not know where they went, but I do wonder. Wonder.

            The story centers on a very specific time, 1969, in a very specific place, North San Diego County. I was turning eighteen, in love, and the world I wanted swirled and revolved around surfing, and surfing revolved around Swamis.

            My apologies for my writing style. Years of writing briefs, documents. Dry, perhaps, but thorough. A friend’s review of an earlier draft concluded I went for detail and clarity rather than flash and description.

“I don’t use a lot of adjectives in regular speech,” I countered.

“But this is writing,” she said, “The prologue shouldn’t be an apology.”

“Honest.”

“Sure, and it is… your own voice. Yes, it is that, and, as your mother said, ‘the mind fills in the colors.’ Different thing, I know. Photos, stories; it still applies.”

“Not arguing.”

“Not yet. But… ambiguity and bullshit aside, you don’t exactly nail down who the killer was. Or killers were. Some detective novel, Atsushi.”

“It’s in there. And… doesn’t that explain the need for detail and clarity? And, more importantly, I never said it was that… A detective novel. Trueheart.”

“There’s no such thing as a seventeen-year-old detective. Not in real life.”

“It’s in there; that quote; in the text. And… as far as real life goes…”

“From your particular viewpoint.”

“That’s all any of us have.”

 “But… Joey… you called me a friend. ‘A friend’s review.’”

“Just another draft, Julie; I can… change it.”

“To what?”

“Keep reading. It’s in there.”

                                    CHAPTER ONE- MONDAY, NOVEMBER 13, 2023

            “The allure of waves was too much, I’m told, for an almost three-year-old, running, naked into them. If I say I remember how the light shone through the shorebreak waves, the streaks of foam sucked into them; if I remember the shock of cold water and the force with which the third wave knocked me down, the pressure that held me down, my struggle for air; if I say I remember anything other than my mother clutching me out and into the glare by one arm… Well, that would be, this all happening before the accident; that would be… me… creating a story from fragments. Wouldn’t it, Doctor?”

            “Memories. Dreams. We can’t know how much of life is created from… fragments. But, please, Joey; the basketball practice story; I didn’t get a chance to write it down. So, the guy…”

            “Locker room. After. I’m not here because of that… offense.”

            “I am aware. Just… humor me.”

            “He said I had a pretty big… dick… for a Jap. I said, ‘Thank you.’ All the Varsity players came in. Most stood behind him. He said, ‘Oh, that’s right; your daddy the cop, he’s all dick.’ Big laugh.”

“Detective,” I said. “Sorry about your brother at the water fountain, but I’m on probation already… and I don’t want to cut my hand… on your front teeth.’”

            “Whoa! Did that end it? Joey. Joey, are you… You’re remembering the incident.”

            “I tried to walk away. He… Basketball. I never had a shot. Good passer, great hip chuck.”

            “All right. So, let’s talk about the incident for which you are here.”

ALL RIGHTS to all ORIGINAL WORK by Erwin A. Dence, Jr. are reserved by the author/illustrator. THANK YOU for respecting these rights, AND, AS ALWAYS, for checking out realsurfers.net

Cut Out of “Swamis”

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The novel is complete… but… HERE is something I tried to write to tie all the stuff together. After the story exposition. Perhaps. The characters have lives after the novel; I’m in the process of deciding that doesn’t have to be explained. I probably will cut Grant Murdoch out of the novel, or at least, edit him down. SIDENOTE- I really didn’t want the dialogue to sound TOO HIP. I read some of my stuff; most likely too hip. Shit!

‘Let me show you my latest acrylic.” Grant Murdoch, Jr.  moved his foot against the Costco cooler bag that was leaning against the chain link fence and turned toward the shower between us and the bathroom building.

I pulled two old PeeChee folders, three notebooks in each, from the bag, coughed, and said, “I hope you’re not… perving out, Grant. I don’t want… guilt by association.”

“Because you’re a local?”

“Because it’s… yeah; the local thing. It’s…”

            Grant was smiling when he turned back toward me. “So, my father said that what he learned from all the notes was…”

            “The notes stolen from me.”

            “I thought you said it was a relief.”

            “It was. I didn’t know shit. People thought I did and told me… everything.”

            “Exactly. You and Grant Fucking Murdoch, Sr. agree. But… then you did.”

            “And… I am curious as to who stole my folders.”

            “Attorney-client privilege?” Grant nodded. “Inherited clients?” Grant smiled.

I put the folders back into the bag, pulled out the twelve-by-eighteen stretched canvas.

            A woman shuffled toward us. She was wearing a spring suit; short legs, full length arms; half-wrapped in a towel and wearing sandals. She leaned a well-used mid-length board against the fence, said, “Boys,” and moved toward Grant for a hug. Not a long one. Greeting length.

“Joey tells me you think he should cut me out of the book?” She didn’t respond. “I don’t move the plot… enough.”

“We’ll see. Joey can’t seem to let the… writing… go.”

            I handed the seascape to Grant, pulled a pair of glasses from the pocket of my sweatshirt, and handed them to Julie. She looked at the painting, put one hand on Grant’s shoulder, the other on mine. “You almost caught the magic there, Grant.”

            “Almost,” Grant said.

            “Magic,” Julie and I said, me just a moment behind her.

COPYRIGHT Erwin A. Dence, Jr. All rights reserved. Thanks for reading. NOW, WHERE are the waves?

“Stagefright” and “Swamis”

Posted on by under "Swamis" the novel, Erwin Dence illustrations, surf art, surf fiction, surf illustrations, surf novels

“And when he gets to the end, he wants to start all over again.” From “Stagefright,” lyrics by Robbie Robertson. Originally performed by The Band.

“I’d rather be clever than funny.” From “Swamis,” spoken by narrator, Joseph Atsushi DeFreines.

Throughout my third (or fourth) total rewrite of my novel I have been thinking that, when I get to THE END, an ending that was vague and unclear as I wrote; knowing that the denouement (I could just say finale) had to be unexpected, clever, AND another character had to die; I also believed that the changes I was making in an attempt to tighten the scope of the story, to focus on fewer characters in a shorter span; all this would tell me how to end “Swamis.”

And, last night, I got to THE END. Again.

EXCEPT, cleverness and conceit and the desire to produce a novel I can unreservedly be proud of continue to collide. IT’S FIXABLE. It just takes more work. Writing this piece this morning is my way of outlining where I have to go. ISSUES:

The events in CHAPTER ONE occur AFTER the timeline of the novel. Prologue that could be epilogue. Perhaps should be. EXPLANATION- I wanted the story to begin with surfing, with establishing JUMPER HAYES as a suspect in the murder of CHULO. I wanted to establish the narrator, JOEY/JODY/ATSUSHI as a non-local outsider longing to be in whatever culture there is in and around Swamis. I wanted to show that Joey had a romantic relationship with JULIA “Julie” COLE, and that the relationship was strained because of something Joey had done. BUT there was hope.

I have been rather insistent that the novel is told from Joey’s PERSPECTIVE, in his voice. It is not my voice. If “Swamis” is memoir, rather than being overly descriptive, Joey insists on clarity.

MY CONCEIT is that, because obsessive note taker Joey has chased down and documented leads, and has discovered who, from street level dealers to wholesalers to money launderers to detectives, was involved in the growth of marijuana as a cash crop in late 60s Southern California; and we, as readers, have the opportunity to be aware of the clues he has collected; when we get to the end, there is no need to further explain. DROP THE FILES and someone else works it out.

NOT THAT SIMPLE.

If I had intended the novel to be more surf/coming-of-age than mystery or ROMANCE, I have not, probably, succeeded. The love between Joey and Julie is the thread that goes outside the other boundaries of “Swamis.”

Speaking of BOUNDARIES; If 100,000 words is my projected boundary, and I kept track along the way, and I have already cut and moved a couple of novel’s worth of chapters and pages, most recently the PROLOGUE- good stuff; I am not ashamed of it, not sure where to put it.

It would definitely be easier to have thought of “Swamis” as two 65,000 word novels. While I am already considering a sequel, possible title, “BEACONS,” I must now see what must be done with CHAPTER ONE. So… Work.

THANKS FOR sticking with me, and… meanwhile, It may or may not be related to all the drawing I have been doing recently, my GORILLA HANDS clutching skinny ass pens and pencils, but I am dealing with this excruciating pain in my right hand that feels like, if I am clutching anything, all the blood in my body is focused on my thumb, and, if I poked, say, the end of it… Yeah; I can imagine how jokes could so easily be made of this. “Too bad it’s your thumb,” “Clutching, you say,” etc.

To provide more opportunity for humor, when I self-diagnosed with the help of the always-reliable internet, it seems the malady is nicknamed “Mommy thumb.” No, it’s because moms seem to suffer with similar symptoms from holding newborns. And no, I don’t see how that compares to my holding cell phones and writing implements. It is, essentially, tendonitis, and yes, when the swelling finally goes down… relief.

ANYway, since I have some actual painting projects coming up, with rest and Ibuprofen and a splint (which, happily, doesn’t seem necessary when typing), my hand’s condition will improve further by the time some actual waves find their way my way. I do hope you are getting the benefits of the atmospheric river.

Check on Wednesday; I may have “Swamis” dialed.